[stash] [squeak] [swag] ✦ zero nicotine ✦ zero booze

Toys for your party animal

Tequila, beers, vapes, blunts, and nic pouches — dripped out as plush squeaky dog toys. Buy any 2, get 1 free. Mix and match below.

Build your stash
Squeaker + crinkle insideFree US shipping $20+30-day squeak guarantee
The Paw Blunt plush dog toy surrounded by Pawraphernalia parody toys on a trippy background Buy 2 ✦ get 1 free

Build your stash

Buy any 2, get 1 free. Mix and match as many as you want — it adds up automatically at checkout.

Buy 2, get 1 free
Best seller

The Paw Blunt

$12.99$19.99
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Cold Ones

$12.99$16.99
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Zen Pupper

$12.99$19.99
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Paw Puffs

$13.99$21.99
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Clase Pawzule

$17.99$26.99
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Green Bottle Brewski

$11.99$19.99
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The Ciggy

$11.99$16.99
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Buy any 2, get 1 free Free US shipping on orders $20+
$0.00

Why the pups stay fly

Squeak + crinkle Loud squeaker inside every toy, crinkle in most.
Plush, not plastic Soft polyester plush that's gentle on teeth and gums.
Parody art Looks real on the coffee table. Contains nothing but fluff.
30-day squeak guarantee Squeaker dies in 30 days? We replace the toy.
German shepherd puppy holding The Paw Blunt plush

Our mission

Funny toys. Serious mission.

Pawraphernalia exists for one reason: to make the funniest dog toys on the planet. Every toy we drop is a parody of something your dog definitely shouldn't have — rebuilt as soft, squeaky plush with zero nicotine, zero booze and zero THC.

We think dogs deserve toys with a sense of humor, and dog people deserve a laugh every time their pup trots into the room with one. That's the whole job. One squeak, one laugh, one very proud dog at a time.

Join the mission

Before you ask

FAQ

How does shipping work?

Orders of $20 or more after discounts ship free to US addresses. Under $20, standard shipping is $4.99. Stack a few toys and you're usually there.

My dog destroys everything. Will these survive?

Honest answer: these are plush toys with a squeaker or crinkle inside, built for play, not for power chewers. If your dog shreds toys for sport, this isn't the stash for them. Always supervise play and pull a toy as soon as it's damaged. Want the photo anyway? Treat it as a supervised five-minute party favor, then put it up on the shelf.

What size are the toys?

Sizes vary by toy — check each listing. Most are 5–10 inches, sized for small to large dogs to carry, toss and tug. Mix sizes freely; any 3 toys count toward the deal.

How do I clean them?

Spot clean or hand wash, then air dry. Same routine for every toy in the stash.

Are these real brands?

No. Every toy is a parody. We're not affiliated with, sponsored by or endorsed by any brand, and nothing contains alcohol, nicotine or THC. It's polyester plush with a squeaker or crinkle inside. The only thing your dog gets buzzed on is the attention.